Pupukea Road

My token social media post 

1 Comment

One of our friends posted a photo of my family on social media. And there, buried within the first few comments he received, someone wrote, “Is that the wife…she’s Ugly!”

It didn’t really strike me at first. I mean, I’ve been on Instagram since its inception and my husband works in broadcast. There are tons of people out there who criticize anything

But as the minutes wore on I found myself going back to it, questioning  it, rationalizing it, and then I did what any self-respecting –  42 year old – mother of 3 would do: I reread it over and over until my eyes turned blurry and then suddenly  *poof* it disappeared. 

(*Not because I wished it away, but because he deleted it along with any comments associated with it. He doesn’t know I know, but I know.  And I appreciate him so much for it.)

Did I think I was ugly? No, but it didn’t feel great to read it OUT LOUD.  Do I need someone to validate my beauty? No, but I am a mom who just doesn’t have time for anything besides potty training and Costco, so checking my appearance hourly is WAY down the list. 

I’m not writing this post because I was called ugly. Rather, it’s a reminder to me of why it’s so important to give my girls enough self esteem and sense of self worth so they can power through life’s ups and downs, even small ones like this. And a reminder that I need to tell them that they are beautiful. Every. Single. Day. 

I cringe thinking about them joining the hordes of teenagers on social media getting high off that  “like”. Yesterday I read about a boy who is blind in one eye and got 48 staples on his head because he fell on a window during the “Duct Tape Challenge” – Google it. 

Life is crazy, then you turn 40 and spending the morning at the beach is a lot more important than buying the next “it” bag. You’re not trying  to please the popular crowd, but trying to love your current friends as much as possible. It’s no longer about being in the hippest spot, but being in the most secluded one. You realize some people are hurting and some just need love.  Your empathy shoots way up and your life-goals are just to get through it in one piece. 
I guess, like a lot of my posts there is no real direction to this, except I do know I need to take better care of myself.  I don’t need you to tell me I am not ugly but I do think we all need to check our (girls) if they are on social media because you just never know what someone random will say.  



Author: jenwilliamshi

Just in case you're wondering, this is what I'm doing on my year off...

One thought on “My token social media post 

  1. I take on a lot of eye rolling and being cast out still at 40 because my kids come first…not coloring my hair or getting my nails done. I know when time allows again I’ll do all that again. In the meantime I’ll just have to be the gray haired ponytail and sweatshirt mom. I think people dont respect it enough that my kids come first.


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